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What Grinds My Gears: Bumperstickers

Grinds My Gears

I do not know if I could be any clearer about my absolute antipathy to spending more time in a vehicle than necessary. The longer I have to spend behind the wheel of my Frontier, the longer I have to stare at your stupid bumper or window sticker. Do you know what really Grinds My Gears? The fact that you think that I, or for that matter anyone else, cares that your child is an honor student. I don’t care to know if you’re voting for the Turd Sandwich or the Giant Douche. I do not need to read some inspirational quote, or need to know that you may or may not have a “Baby on Board”. It just riles me up driving along minding my own business when I come upon a car with signage all over it. It is like passing a Wall Drug billboard in South Dakota, you don’t want to, but you’re going to read it. 

You steal seconds from my life and bring me closer to my first heart attack each time I find myself reading one of these idiotic little blurbs about your life. We are not friends; I do not need t...

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